UpDating! : How to Capture the Man or Woman

You know you're too good for the pool of potential partners you've been swimming in.

Leil Lowndes (New York, NY) is one of today's most sought-after communication consultants. She is the author of the international bestsellers How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You and How to Be a People Magnet

Introduction

ix

What's Keeping Me Back? So Why Do I Keep Dating Frogs?

1

(24)

Bugs and Beasts Are Smarter When Choosing a Mate

2

(1)

Hang-Up #1: Fear of Failure

3

(1)

Hang-Up #2: Staying with the Familiar

4

(1)

Hang-Up #3: Being Emotionally Needy

5

(1)

Hang-Up #4: Feeling Life and Love Are Predestined

5

(2)

What If Some Frogs Still Turn Me On?

7

(2)

Time to Play for Keeps

9

(2)

All Proven Fact, No Pulp Fiction

11

(1)

Researchers Write in a Code Called Impossible to Read

12

(2)

So What's the Secret?

14

(1)

The Horse-Trading Principle of Love

15

(4)

You Gotta Be One to Get One

19

(1)

Birds of a Royal Feather

20

(1)

Similarity Runs Even Deeper

21

(2)

The Big Bonus

23

(2)

You Won't Find Your Prince or Princess Until You Go Cold Turkey on Frogs: Paving the Path for a Better Mate

25

(36)

How Do I Start?

26

(2)

Doing the Dirty Deed

28

(3)

The Ditching Dilemma

31

(1)

Women, You Must Ditch or Drown

32

(4)

Men, Get in Touch with Your Inner Coward

36

(3)

Good-Bye, Old Frog---Hello, New Prince(ess)

39

(2)

Ya Gotta Know da Habits of da Critter

41

(1)

Inspect Your Own Feathers

42

(1)

You Gotta Be a Human Chameleon

43

(2)

Fake It til You Make It

45

(1)

The ``Location, Location, Location'' Law of Love

46

(1)

Crossing Paths

47

(3)

Familiarity Breeds Contempt---but Not in Courting!

50

(1)

The ``Mere Exposure'' Rule of Love

51

(5)

How Gillian Got Her Prince

56

(2)

Digging Deeper

58

(3)

How to Find a Drop-Dead Gorgeous Mate: The Challenge of Capturing a Beautiful Princes or Handsome Prince

61

(24)

What If I'm Not a ``Looker''?

62

(2)

Whose Looks Are More Vital: A Woman's or a Man's?

64

(2)

Here's the Skinny on Getting a Gorgeous Partner

66

(1)

Why He or She Digs That Turkey (and Not Me, f'Instance)

66

(7)

Flattery Won't Get You Anywhere with a Looker

73

(8)

I Love You for the Reasons You Love Yourself

81

(4)

How to Capture a Rich or ``High-Class'' Mate: Class Is Not a Dirty Word

85

(46)

So What's ``Classy''?

87

(7)

Decorating Your Pad to Impress a Royal

94

(8)

How Classy Is Your Home?

102

(4)

The Classy Car---It's Not What You'd Think!

106

(6)

Classy and Classless Fun and Games

112

(2)

I Haven't Got a Thing to Wear!

114

(9)

The Most Accurate Class Indicator

123

(3)

How Important Are Looks to Classy People?

126

(3)

Now Are You Sure You Want It?

129

(2)

How to Find an Honorable Mate: Where Have All the Good Men and Women Gone?

131

(34)

No Slipups in Your Scruples Diet

136

(1)

Coming Clean Counts

137

(2)

Why Does This Need for Similarity Run So Deep?

139

(1)

Character Count

140

(2)

The Prince Who Turned Out to Be a Frog

142

(3)

Come Across as a ``Really Good Person'' from the Get-Go

145

(1)

Integrity as Bait

146

(3)

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun---Not!

149

(2)

Your Home Is Not Your Castle---It's a Peek into Your Soul

151

(2)

The Minute She Enters Your Office, She's Sherlock Holmes

153

(2)

A Word to Wise Women

155

(1)

Different Kinds of Similarities

155

(1)

Fake It and You'll Break It

156

(4)

What About ``Opposites Attract''?

160

(1)

Sometimes the Need for Similarity Is Crazy

161

(4)

How to Capture a Magical One-of-a-kind Mate: Taming the X-Royal

165

(14)

Tracking Down X-Royals in Their Natural Habitat

167

(1)

Xs Use Brains, Not Brawn, to Get What They Want

168

(2)

Make Sure You Really Want an X-Royal

170

(1)

A Triple X-Rated Royal

171

(4)

Be Yourself, Your Most Interesting Self

175

(4)

The Crucial Confidence Factor: Self-Concept Is Everything

179

(26)

Self-Confidence Reigns in the Royal's Kingdom

182

(1)

You Don't Make the First Move

183

(2)

You Blow the Relationship

185

(3)

You Won't Be Able to Love Your Royal Successfully

188

(1)

We Know the Sickness---What's the Cure?

189

(2)

It Works the Other Way, Too

191

(2)

Be Careful What You Wish For (You Just Might Get It!)

193

(7)

The Last Word

200

(5)

Notes

205

(4)

Index

209

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UpDating! : How to Capture the Man or Woman You Once Thought Out of Your League

Summary

Author Biography

Table of Contents

Supplemental Materials