Smiling Through My Tears : A True Story of a Child's Faith, a Mother's Hope and God's Grace

There were times when smiles were evasive and tears profuse, but there were also many minutes, days, and months when the smiles and the tears became one and the same. Smiling through My Tearsis a poignant story that chronologically unfolds the meaningful life and untimely death of my son-who could have easily been anyone's child or neighbor. Smiling through My Tearsis an unveiling of an "everyday American," dealing with a not-so-everyday, childhood disease. It touches everyone's heart and soul. It offers strength to those living through similar circumstances, as well as understanding and peace to those who are the survivors.

The morning of Terry’s surgery arrived. My entire family was waiting with me. For the moment, their presence gave me strength. We began our vigil, expecting two to four hours of surgery. I halfheartedly eavesdropped on all the normal waiting room conversations about symptoms, illnesses, and doctors, both good and bad. One family talked about a mother’s gall bladder surgery, another about a sister’s hysterectomy. And so it continued, the nervous chatter of families all hoping or praying for the best.      The waiting room was packed. I remember the noise as clearly as if it were yesterday. The voices of people were all running together: booming voices, soft voices, and sometimes annoying voices. And there was the clickety-clack of shoes on the tile floor as people hurried down the halls. As they passed by, some would glance our way, not having any idea of the fear and grief that was unfolding only a few footsteps away. I remember thinking how normal their lives were and that mine would never be normal again.