The Two-Minute Secret to Staying in Love Simple, Powerful Ways to Make Your Marriage Last

Marry the one you love, and love the one you marry. It sounds simple enough. But staying in love turns out to be a whole lot different than falling in love. In a world of constant distraction, marriage experts agree that the little things matter—a lot. The Two-Minute Secret for Staying in Love explores the little things couples think, say, and do to stay in love for the long haul.

Supported by expert studies, interviews with happily married couples, and years of personal experience, author Heidi Poelman shares the simple secrets that keep love alive. Whether it’s choosing an attitude of gratitude, leaving a love note, giving a welcome-home hug at the door, or calling just to say “Hello,” The Two-Minute Secret for Staying in Love is full of simple ways to love the one you married, two minutes at a time.

Heidi is the author of the Little Heroes series, Jesus Worked Miracles, A is for Abinadi, A is for Adam, I Can Love Like Jesus, The Two-Minute Secret to Staying in Love, and A Mother's Greatest Gift. She particularly enjoys writing about inspiring people and ways to strengthen families, and she lives with her husband Scott and their four bright-eyed children.

• Preface
• Chapter 1 First comes love, then comes marriage. “Falling” in love: What’s love got to do with it? Staying in love: What’s in it for me?
• Chapter 2 Two-minute moments: Why little things matter so much
• Chapter 3 What were you thinking? It’s all about perspective What lens are you using? Focusing on strengths. Self-fulfilling prophecy. Assuming the best Gratitude. Your happiness is my happiness
• Chapter 4 Say what? The power of loving words: “I love you” “I am grateful for you” “I admire you.” Compliments. Make ‘em laugh. Connect through questions. Powerful pronouns. Celebrate your spouse. Couple codes
• Chapter 5 Taking action: The little deeds that make a big difference. Create rituals. Serve your spouse. Support your spouse. Leave a love note. Surprise your spouse. Connect by phone. Great greetings. Who’s number one? Are you listening? Be responsive. I want what you want. Dress to impress. Be playful. Be attentive. Walk down memory lane. Love through music. Ask your spouse out. Loving touch
• Chapter 6 Get a Little Closer: Small Steps Toward Great Intimacy. 1st key ingredient: Emotional intimacy. 2nd key ingredient: Appreciate the importance. 3rd key ingredient: Set the stage. 4th key ingredient: Communicate. 5th key ingredient: Selflessness
• Chapter 7 Fight the good fight: Simple tools for handling conflict. Start softly. Seek first to understand. Use questions for clarity. Check in when in doubt. Reflective listening. Validating and empathizing. It’s not you, it’s me. Body language. Say what you mean. Say what you do want. Consider timing. Take five. Let it go. Try gratitude. Think win/win
• Chapter 8 What not to do: Bitter behaviors that take a big bite. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t make assumptions. Don’t criticize. Don’t get defensive. Don’t withdraw. Don’t respond when you’re angry. Don’t say always and never (in negative ways). Don’t compare. Don’t keep score
• Chapter 9 Coming back together: Apologies and forgiveness
• Chapter 10 How do you love me? A word on differences. Consider your childhood. Consider differences between men and women. Consider your love languages
• Chapter 11 Carry on: Love is a verb

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