You Cannot Be Serious

Whether she's negotiating a truce between her 10- and 5-year-old while eulogizing goldfish, swinging a sledgehammer in her garage-to-be nursery, bribing her twins to keep their pants on in the grocery store, planning her product line, strategically placing carrot seeds in her garden, receiving life lessons from her oldest daughter, or explaining to her kids why a fellow post office patron has pierced nipples, Elizabeth Lyons has discovered that the secret to navigating the land of euphoria and hysteria is a carefully crafted set of rules-for herself!

Elizabeth Lyons is many things: mom, wife, friend, lunch maker, chauffeur, hostage negotiator, on-call plumber, tile layer, guitar student, window washer, product designer, and on and on. One thing she is not is Superwoman. She simply demands the right to do things her own way--a way that often defies even the most creative imaginations--and she strives to inspire others to do things their way (once they figure out what their way is!). Elizabeth lives in Arizona with her husband, five kids, two dogs, two fish, four barely surviving organic gardens, and whatever (or whomever) has taken up residence with them since this manuscript went to print. She claims this is the last book she'll write (which she also claimed the last time). Author's home: Buckeye, Arizona