Connecting With Kids Through Stories

Adopted children whose early development has been altered by abuse or neglect may form negative beliefs about themselves and parents, and may resist connecting with others. This book outlines how therapeutic stories can help children to heal and develop healthy attachments. With a thorough theoretical grounding, the book demonstrates how to create therapeutic stories that improve relationships, heal past trauma, and change problem behaviour. The story of a fictional family that develops its own narratives to help their adopted child heal illustrates the techniques. This second edition includes updated research on attachment, trauma and the developmental process; a new chapter on parental attunement and regulation; and a new chapter with full length samples of a variety of narrative types. The gentle and non-intrusive techniques in this book will be highly beneficial for children with attachment difficulties. This guide will be an invaluable resource for parents of adopted children and the professionals working with them.

The authors are all based at the Family Attachment and Counseling Center, Minnesota, USA. Denise B. Lacher is a psychologist who specializes in treating children who have experienced maltreatment in early life. Todd Nichols is Executive Director. He is co-recipient of the 2008 Pro Humanitate Award issued by the Center for Child Welfare Policy and sole recipient of the 2007 New Horizons Award issued by the Association for Treatment and Training in the Attachment of Children. Melissa Nichols is a marriage and family therapist who specializes in treating children who have experienced abandonment, neglect, and abuse early in life. Joanne C. May is a licensed psychologist and marriage and family therapist and founder of the Family Attachment and Counseling Center. She has over 50 years' experience working with families, children and adolescents.

Legacy of an Adopted Child	p. 9
Acknowledgments	p. 11
Introduction	p. 13
Note	p. 16
The Internal Working Model	p. 17
...and so it begins...the formation of the internal working Attachment relationships	p. 18
The development of attachment	p. 20
The importance of attachment relationships	p. 24
The transmission of attachment	p. 25
Life events	p. 25
Complex trauma	p. 27
The effects of trauma	p. 29
Development	p. 30
Meanings (or "peanut butter and a crib")	p. 33
Summary	p. 36
Putting the Pieces Together: Discovering the Child's Model	p. 40
The search	p. 40
Discovery	p. 43
Summary	p. 55
Narratives That Bond, Heal, and Teach	p. 57
How Narratives Work	p. 58
Neuroscience of narratives	p. 59
How stories can be therapy	p. 59
Summary	p. 60
Constructing and Telling Stories	p. 63
The setting for Family Attachment Narrative Therapy	p. 63
The perspective	p. 65
The hero	p. 66
The message	p. 67
Incorporating props in the telling	p. 69
Additional thoughts	p. 70
Summary	p. 71
Parental Attunement and Regulation	p. 73
How attunement and regulation enhance or alter development	p. 75
How to Attune to your Child	p. 76
Components of attunement	p. 79
Factors affecting attunement	p. 81
Regulation Helping your Child to Calm	p. 85
Factors affecting regulation	p. 86
Techniques to enhance attachment and increase regulation	p. 90
Summary	p. 95
Claiming Narratives	p. 96
The purpose of Claiming Narratives	p. 97
When parents find it difficult to bond	p. 97
When the child finds it difficult to trust	p. 98
Shifting the child's internal working model	p. 99
Establishing birth order	p. 100
Claiming the extended family	p. 101
Passing on the family traditions, history, and rituals	p. 102
Other issues	p. 102
Summary	p. 103
Telling Claiming Narratives	p. 104
If you had been...	p. 104
Problem-solving tips	p. 109
Summary	p. 112
Trauma Narratives	p. 113
The purpose of Trauma Narratives	p. 113
Healing the pain of trauma	p. 114
Shifting the child's internal working model	p. 115
Creating understanding and empathy	p. 115
Summary	p. 117
Telling Trauma Narratives	p. 117
When to seek professional help	p. 125
Problem-solving tips	p. 128
Summary	p. 130
Developmental Narratives	p. 131
The Purpose of Developmental Narratives	p. 131
Facilitating cognitive development	p. 132
Facilitating emotional development	p. 134
Building relationships	p. 135
Remedial skill building	p. 136
Enhancing development	p. 138
Summary	p. 138
Telling Developmental Narratives	p. 139
When you were a two-year-old you would have...	p. 140
Problem-solving tips	p. 146
Summary	p. 147
Successful Child Narratives	p. 149
The Purpose of Successful Child Narratives	p. 150
Teaching children values	p. 150
Reinforcing cause and effect thinking	p. 151
Presenting alternative behaviors	p. 151
Explaining the basics of how to do life	p. 153
Summary	p. 154
Telling Successful Child Narratives	p. 154
The meaning of behavior	p. 155
Changing behaviors with narratives	p. 158
Teaching behavior with narratives	p. 161
Problem-solving tips	p. 165
Summary	p. 166
Stories, Stories, and More Stories	p. 167
Claiming narrative example	p. 168
Trauma narrative example	p. 172
Another trauma narrative	p. 175
Trauma narrative example: For older adopted children	p. 178
Trauma narrative example: For an internationally adopted child	p. 181
Developmental narrative example: How children learn secure base behaviors	p. 187
Developmental narrative example: How children learn to regulate anger and frustration	p. 188
Successful child narrative example	p. 190
Successful child narrative: Telling the truth	p. 192
Trauma/successful child narrative- How to move forward	p. 194
"Rosebud," by Gaye Guyton	p. 194
Trauma/successful child narrative: Lying and stealing	p. 201
Developmental/successful child narrative: Learning how to be a friend	p. 202
Successful child narrative: Learning to trust	p. 204
"Mistfire," by Donna Oehrig	p. 204
Summary	p. 208
Conclusion	p. 209
A final word	p. 210
EMDR	p. 212
Story Construction Guide	p. 213
References	p. 215
Resources and Further Reading	p. 223
Subject Index	p. 232
Author Index	p. 237
Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved.

What is included with this book?

The New copy of this book will include any supplemental materials advertised. Please check the title of the book to determine if it should include any access cards, study guides, lab manuals, CDs, etc.

The Used, Rental and eBook copies of this book are not guaranteed to include any supplemental materials. Typically, only the book itself is included. This is true even if the title states it includes any access cards, study guides, lab manuals, CDs, etc.

FREE SHIPPING

Amazon no longer offers textbook rentals. We do!

Connecting With Kids Through Stories

Summary

Author Biography

Table of Contents

Supplemental Materials